FAT49 #10 – Platforming

“So, the A-B connecting bridge located at the top of this strut will lead us to Strut A where we can find Chang?” Felix clarified.
“Yes, that’s what I just finished saying.” Grgl said with the unsurprise of one who was ignored often. He was younger than his sister. He couldn’t have been older than the main character of a YA novel about zombies, rebellion, angst, post-apocalypse and/or magix. Such novels were commonplace in the Gnome Archipelago and were mostly attributed to one author: I. B. Good. This was of course A Pseudonym. Mr and Mrs Pseudonym had been at a loss with the birth of their 17th child and when asked by the official person what their child’s name was they replied: “A…” The official, who was feeling rather impatient that day, recorded this utterance as her name. A was a bookish child because she found that books didn’t tease her about her name. When she started writing she decided to attribute it a different name, I. B. Good. She would later become one of the most popular authors around with her first book: Teenage Heroine Rebels Egregiously Against Imperial Scum. Her name was forever etched into the annals of history. Many authors today pay homage to her by coming up with a fake name they call: “a pseudonym”. Her most popular work was the Iago Zacklii Trilogy. The second book, Iago Zacklii and the Flagnork, was a smash hit and any self-respecting person owns a copy. Beardface lives in the mountains and can’t read, Jean lives in the desert and spends most of her time looking after her siblings and training, Felix has no interest in human books, Ranaweyt spends most of his days poring over magix scrolls and Bloop spends most of her time plotting revenge so none of them have read the book. Grgl, who would consider himself fairly fashionable and trendy, has read the entire trilogy.
“There’s no need to fight unnecessarily. We should simply ask if they can lead us to Chang.” Felix reasoned. “Ah, look here’s someone now. Excuse me.”
“!” said someone now.
“We were wondering if you might show us to Chang?”
“Gah! A talking cat!” they screeched and ran away.
“There’ll be no escort then.” Beardface said.
“Then we’ll just have to do this the old fashioned way.” Felix said. “Platforming.”

#10 Platforming

“Phew, we made it! The A-B connecting bridge.” Felix said.
“It’s a lot less impressive than the B-C connecting bridge.” Bloop noted.
“What were those foul pumpkin monsters?” Beardface said.
“Did anyone see that crocodile?” Jean said.
“Check out all these sweet floating coins I got.” Grgl said excitedly.
“Come on, everyone. I feel like the fun is only just beginning.” Felix said.

F.O.T. Chang looked down disdainfully at the guard in front of him.
“A talking cat, you say?”
“Yes, Boss!”
“Why did you not bring it to me?”
“Uh…I was going to…”
“Why would you do that? I hate cats.”
“Uh… I mean… that was… I…”
“I hate stuttering.”
“Sorry, Boss.”
“I hate apologies.”
“And, I hate ellipses.” Chang said and snapped his fingers.
There was a flash of light and the guard fell to the floor as a wad of money.
“Excellent work, Henry.” Chang said, “I love money.”
“I live to please you.” said Henry, who had the familiar blue tinged skin of a wizard.
“Flagnork.” said the monstrosity standing on Chang’s right.
“Too slow, Flagnork.” Henry taunted.
“Flagnork.” Flagnork replied.
“I hate you too.” Henry cackled.
There was a creak and a boom as the doors to Strut A burst open.
“Chang!” bellowed Bloop.
“I feel like the hate is only just beginning.” Chang grimaced.




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