FAT49 #3 – To Flockboast!

The problem with traveling in large groups is organising transport. After multiple failed attempts to hire carriage drivers, chariots and a dirigible they decided to walk. They traipsed in a single file line, led by Felix of course, toward Flockboast city.
The journey to Flockboast was mostly uneventful.
A group of fish-wielding bandits attempted to mug them but the not-to-be-reckoned-with-lightly masters soon put them in their plaice.
The path was busy. Flockboast was the trading capital of the Gnome Archipelago. The city was crowded with people, too many to fit within its huge walls. Large satellite settlements had developed outside the city and the people flocked into work from these places everyday. Traffic was terrible at the best of times. Felix and the 49 found themselves moving at a snail’s pace, very literally. One of the traders had a giant snail (although slow they are reliable goods transporters, salt products not included). It should be noted that although the masters are tough and ready for a fight they are polite. They won’t simply use their power to sweep aside people that irritate them, racketeers not included

All was peaceful and calm when suddenly something went wrong. A thundering sound erupted from the trees of the forest that grew on the east side of the road. A hulking creature, probably large enough to fit roughly 49 people give or take a cat, walked right through the well-trodden path squishing several bystanders in the process and making it even more well-trodden.

“A land-whale!” bellowed an excited trader.
“I know!” said one of the recently squished traders.
“That beauty could carry any ware anywhere at a lightning pace!” said another whose snail was deeply offended.
They were too slow. Felix’s eyes had flashed at the sight of the land-whale and he leaped after it. There was a wake of crushed debris behind it which Felix jumped over effortlessly. He finally managed to catch up with it after hopping over a gumboom (tree commonly found in the Leafy Layer of Perpetuum’s Forest) that somersaulted clumsily passed.

“My friend! Might I have a word with you?” Felix called. The land-whale turned his mighty head and slowed his pace.
“Ah yee. What is it, mate?” said the land-whale.
“I was wondering if you might aid us in our quest. We are in search of Valiant the Aforementioned.”
“Sweet-as. So, what you need me for?”
“My friend, your body is truly mighty. My comrades and I are many and the path is long and slow. I would be grateful if you would give us a lift to Flockboast city.”
“Ah, you wanna go to Flockboast, ey? It wasn’t really where I was headed.”
“Our quest is important to us. We will not be perturbed.”
“Ah yee? Well, what’s in it for me, ey?” the land-whale asked.

Damn! Felix and his fellows had only been on the quest for such a short time. They hadn’t yet picked up any useful items to trade. Felix decided there was only one thing he could do: Break the fourth wall.
“We’ll make this week’s pixel pic of you.” Felix said hopefully.
“Kewl! But, make it look like I’m on a beach paradise!” The land-whale said.

#3 LLywelyn the Land Whale at the Beach
Llywelyn the land-whale (centre)

The author (and pixel pic creator) tuts disapprovingly at this flagrant use of his friendly temperament. He considers killing off one of his characters in a coming chapter. He looks at the clock and decides its about time to post on his blog. He considers finishing his essay due on Monday. He ponders the movie he just watched. With embarrassment he realises he is writing down his thoughts on his blog instead of his daily journal. He decides this joke has gone on long enough and decides to post before he loses either of his viewers.

Llywelyn the land-whale’s Theme:
Someone’s Rocking My Dreamboat – The Ink Spots (1942)




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